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Why I dislike special days geared towards me..

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  • Why I dislike special days geared towards me..

    I dread every year my birthday & Mother's Day. OH I love the projects my kids create for me in school for Mother's Day and would be totally happy if that was all it was to the day.

    But no.. on my Birthday & mother's Day.. DH gets up late, is a total bear, rants and raves at the kids. After an hour of this he has them get ready and takes them shopping for me.
    Maybe it is me but what ever he brings home will mean nothing to me. If you are going to shop for me do it out of love not because you feel like you have to. Oh I wil uhhh and ahh at my gifts for the kids sake.

    These special mom days are no surprise, same day very year. Why can't they be taken care of ahead of time instead of last minute. He had the kids ask me 3 weeks ago what I would like for Mom's Day. they wrote it down for him. But nothing gets down until noon of that day.
    Kids gave me their gifts they made this morning..Beautiful heartfelt cards. He was mad that they gave them to me when I got up.

    I don't know why I am upset.. this happens every year has for last 12yrs.
    well.. off to start some laundry.

  • #2
    I'm so sorry. That just sucks.

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    • #3
      My family doesn't ever worry about Mother's day, or birthdays. We honor each other every day and don't need a "special" day to do it.
      Start thinking about it in that way and tell them that you do not want, or need, it celebrated on a certain day.
      Besides, those special days are geared toward merchants anyway.

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      • #4
        im sorry, but to me it sounds like hubby needs an attitude adjustment

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        • #5
          And what happens of Father's Day or his birthday? Just the opposite, I'll bet.

          Things have improved here since I got a daughter-in-law (just have a son, no daughter). MEN........

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          • #6
            Gayle, not all men are that way,give some of us credit, lol

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            • #7
              I'm lucky I get a text message....oh well......

              I work with a man that was asked by another woman in the office - 'what are you getting your wife for Mothers' Day?' His reply was that she is not my mother, I'm not getting her anything. Awkward moment....so the woman then says well aren't you taking the kids shopping for their mom and again his reply was NOPE, not my mother. That's their responsibility.

              I understand what you are saying, I really do. I agree, it is the same time every year. I don't think you can tell the kids to not bother. They are so excited making things at school......tread carefully with the kids. Ignore the husband. Children learn what they live and maybe that is how he lived as a child.

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              • #8
                Why I dislike special holidays

                I am totally sympathetic with you. Today being mother's day guess who is doing the cooking.....yup me. I have two adult daughters still living at home and of course my husband, but I'm doing the cooking. Grrrrrr
                I cured my husband of the birthday thing. After years of getting nothing(not even a card) for my birthday when his birthday came around the next year I did not make a special dinner as I always had, no cake, no presents no card. It cured it real fast. lol
                My girls got me presents...I am not a materialistic person at all so the present thing isn't important to me. What I would love is for them to go in the kitchen and say mom here let me cook dinner today or mom we're gonna take you out for dinner.
                The other option you would have is to go on strike. lol My best friend did that. She got so sick of her husband doing the stuff he did like this she went on strike. There was two things she did that were hilarious and to this day we all tease her about it. She got so sick of cleaning up after her husband. He had left his dirty underwear on the floor. So she took those dirty underwear and packed it between two slices of bread and placed it in his lunch for work the next day. The other thing she did was she got so tired of him not appreciating her that she stayed up one night and sewed all his pant legs shut. This woman has a marvelous sense of humor!

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by AllieK
                  My family doesn't ever worry about Mother's day, or birthdays. We honor each other every day and don't need a "special" day to do it.
                  Start thinking about it in that way and tell them that you do not want, or need, it celebrated on a certain day.
                  Besides, those special days are geared toward merchants anyway.

                  Amen! I call this, Valentine's and grandparents' day "Hallmark" days. What's next? Son's Day? Daughter's Day? Cousin's Day, etc., etc., etc.??? My DDs fortunately both live within 5 miles of my home, and when/if I need either of them, they're here. That's all I need.

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                  • #10
                    angelbutterfly

                    my dh is not very romantic and doesn't make a fuss..he did take me to the movies and out to lunch and home depot afterwards and bought flowers for my garden..i got hugs from my teenage kids..that's all i want from them...

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                    • #11
                      I am so sorry Mommy.... He probably has no idea how that makes you feel. He makes it sound like an "obligation" and who wants to be the cause of feeling like they are really "putting someone out"? Shame on him.... I'm afraid I would be tempted to open my big mouth while he was ranting and raving and tell him if it's that much damn stress and trouble for him, to just FORGET IT! Of course, that wouldn't make your day any better either.....

                      ((((((HUGS))))))

                      HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!
                      Lauren ~The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people. ~
                      Martin Luther King, Jr.

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                      • #12
                        Just gotta ask.. what does he do for his mother???

                        Is it a Hallmark day.. not in my book. I don't need presents (cards are nice).. and yes I've brought my children up to observe Mothers Day and Fathers Day - I've told them since they were young, parents NEED a special day, as each day we make it SPECIAL for them. This is the day you THANK you mother/father for being there.. being a friend.

                        It stuck ~~

                        2 of my children are working today..they came by yesterday. DD sent me a card and put her own THANK YOU note inside.(she also stopped by with flowers after work today. stayed for a bit but we had a bonding day yesterday.) . DS.. just came by and thanked me for being there for him. DS#2.. called from Cali.. My day was complete..


                        As for Fathers Day.. just do what you have.. Don't stoop to his level. You r better than that!


                        I'm sure your children appreciate all your love and care ~~

                        and if I see him.. can I kick him in the butt??
                        Tessa

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                        • #13
                          [/QUOTE]and if I see him.. can I kick him in the butt?? [/QUOTE]


                          Ooooh, can I be next??
                          Lauren ~The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people. ~
                          Martin Luther King, Jr.

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                          • #14
                            i just love the undie/sandwich,a good one.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by lucy bear
                              i just love the undie/sandwich,a good one.
                              Definitely a Classic, eh??
                              Lauren ~The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people. ~
                              Martin Luther King, Jr.

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