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You Do the Math...

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  • You Do the Math...

    ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
    Smart man + smart woman = romance
    Smart man + dumb woman = affair
    Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
    Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
    ______________________________
    OFFICE ARITHMETIC
    Smart boss + smart employee = profit
    Smart boss + dumb employee = production
    Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
    Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
    _____________________________
    SHOPPING MATH
    A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
    A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
    _____________________________
    GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
    A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
    A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
    A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
    A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
    _____________________________
    HAPPINESS
    To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
    To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
    ______________________________
    LONGEVITY
    Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
    ______________________________
    PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
    A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
    A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
    _____________________________
    DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
    A woman has the last word in any argument.
    Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
    _____________________________
    HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
    Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

  • #2
    this is so true, good one, lol

    Comment


    • #3
      NU.....I thought you were not allowed to do math in the forums anymore???

      Huffle
      God grant me the serenity to accept the yarn I cannot return... courage to change the yarn I can... and the reciept to know the difference.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Huffle View Post
        NU.....I thought you were not allowed to do math in the forums anymore???

        Huffle
        That's why I said "you" do the math! Like DUH!!!

        Comment


        • #5
          I love the last one !! I gotta remember that one..

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by nuisance View Post
            That's why I said "you" do the math! Like DUH!!!
            DOH!! Ok Nu your right this time. But I think we found out I couldn't do math any better than you....so oh well.

            Huffle
            God grant me the serenity to accept the yarn I cannot return... courage to change the yarn I can... and the reciept to know the difference.

            Comment

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