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    An elderly gent was invited to an old friend's home for dinner one evening. He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. The couple had been married almost 70 years and, clearly, they were still very much in love.

    While the wife was in the kitchen, the man leaned over and said to his host, "I think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names."

    The old man hung his head. "I have to tell you the truth," he said. "Her name slipped my mind about 10 years ago and I'm scared to death to ask her what it is!"

    Married Life...

    Three women friends, one in a casual relationship, one engaged to be married and one a long-time wife, met for drinks after work. The conversation eventually drifted towards how best to spice up their sex lives. After much excitement and discussion, they decided to bravely surprise their men by engaging in some S&M role playing!

    The following week, as agreed, they met up again to compare notes: Sipping her drink, the single girl smiled and said, 'Last Friday towards the end of the day I went to my boyfriend's office wearing a leather coat. When all the other people had left, I slipped out of it and all I had on was a leather bodice, black stockings and stiletto heels. He was incredibly aroused and we made mad passionate love on his desk right then and there!'

    The engaged woman giggled and said, 'That's pretty much my story as well! When my fiancÚ got home last Friday, he found me waiting for him in a black mask, leather bodice, black hose and stiletto pumps. He was so turned on that we not only made love all night, he wants to anticipate our wedding date!

    The married woman was smiling all along and as the others wait in anticipation put her glass down slowly, says, 'I planned everything carefully... I made arrangements for the kids to stay over at Grandma's; I went to the hairdressers and had hair and nails done and just before he got home took a long scented-oil bath and then put on some new sexy perfume bought just for this... I slipped into a tight leather bodice, a black garter belt, black stockings and six-inch stilettos. I finished it off with a black mask!

    When my husband got home from work, he grabbed a beer and the remote, sat down and yelled,

    'Hey, Batman, what's for dinner?'
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