Real Friend Test

[nuisance]

REAL FRIEND TEST!


A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself
and doesn't feel even the least bit weird shutting your
'beer/Pepsi drawer' with her foot!

A simple friend has never seen you cry.
A real friend shoulder is soggy from your tears..

A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names.
A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays
late to help you clean.

A simple friend hates it when you call after they've gone to bed.
A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.

A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems.
A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

A simple friend wonders about your romantic history.
A real friend could blackmail you with it!

A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when
you have an argument.
A real friend calls you after you had a fight.

A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real friend expects to always be there for you!





When you are down to nothing....
God is up to something.

'Never frown, even when you are sad, because you
never know who is falling in love with your smile. '

[Ro-Ro]

Re: Real Friend Test

I love that. Its so true too. I only have about 3 real friends.

Thank you Lisa - True Friend for 43 years
Thank you Denise - True Friend for 39 years
Thank you Dawn - True Friend for 8 years


They will never see this but wanted to honor them!

[Roxy]

Re: Real Friend Test

Good one....I could add this one to it too. When I was in the hospital..in a coma...I got flowers and cards...and when I got out of the hospital...do you think anyone of those people who sent them contacted me???? NO! I did call these so called friends who had sent me flowers and I stopped calling them since they never called me. I guess they figured that I would die and they felt guity for the way they treated me-which they should! so they sent the flowers....long and true story on that one. I have no interest in meeting new friends either...true friends do not exist period...from my experience anyway.

MY HON IS MY TRUE FRIEND I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND MY DOGS AND CATS ARE TOO

[Tiptop]

Re: Real Friend Test

And I thought I was the only one who felt that way about friends. My experience was a sudden kidney failure and transplant. My DH donated his kidney for me and my "friends" didn't even come to visit at hospital or home.

DHs and animals are all the friends I need.

[nuisance]

Re: Real Friend Test

You Find Out Real Quick Who Your "real" Friends Are When You Have A Crisis/problem. Unfortunately It's Not As Many As You Would Think!!

[TexAnn]

Re: Real Friend Test

Good friends are real treasures !!

[Roxy]

Re: Real Friend Test

Tiptop....I am happy that you got a transplant & I hope that you are doing well.Your dh is a sweetie I think dh stands for dear husband??? I am not sure on what some of the abbreviations on here stand for. I don't do abbreviations. I know how you feel..not one so called friend came to see me either when I was in the hospital or at home and a person who I thought was my best friend...lived in the same town where I got operated on and stuff and she didn't even come to see me either! Some people have a philosophy that a tragedy can't happen to them and that their so called friends and so called family will be there for them...what a JOKE that is. They better wake up to the fact that a tragedy can happen to them and they will find out fast who their real friends are and if they have family ...that is if any of them really show up. Oh and if a family member suddenly shows up out of nowhere...make sure it is for the right reason that they love you and they don't want to take over your bank accounts and your life..like being a guardian! My so called sister took control of my bank accounts and more..and she got alot of money! When our sister died..(I was very close to her)...I called my sister who popped out of nowhere when I was in the hospital and I left a message on her answering machine...I didn't want to tell her about it on a dang machine -but I did...she wouldn't talk to me. I left my phone number also.. Well..guess what...she didn't even bother to call me! The big laugh is..she is a social worker and has gotten awards for being one..I believe that a true friend is your MATE and your pets. If you are all wondering if I bother to talk to people..yes I do...I just watch myself and I don't let them get past my wall. Take care Tiptop and I hope that you have a good day

*I know this is long...oh I have alot more I could tell you..but..it isn't worth me getting upset more than I am. I am with you on that TipTop...my hon and my pets are all that I want and need.

[Sabine]

Re: Real Friend Test

If that is how you truly feel you better hope that your hon and your pets outlive you, otherwise you will be a very lonely person.

[Roxy]

Re: Real Friend Test

Yes that is how I really feel...and I do hope I go first before my hon and pets. I don't expect for anyone to understand how Tiptop and I feel unless they have walked in our shoes and most of you haven't, so I don't expect you all to.understand. The definiton "lonely" can mean different things. I am not lonely if you mean bored...I keep very busy. If you meant "lonely" by not talking to people...been there many times and it doesn't bother me any. You get used to it after you have built a wall on your heart like I have. Do I want people to feel sorry for me..NO..that is the last thing I want. Do I want people to talk to me.other than my hon..doesn't bother me any if they do or not I will say hi to my neighbor and people we do know and I am polite....however..there is no crossing my wall. LIke I said..unless you have been where Tiptop and I have been...I don't expect you or anyone else to understand and I don't mean for this to sound rude..just saying it the way it is. I play backgammon over the computer and I have alot of backgammon friends..however...I feel safe to call them friends because I know they can't hurt me in my real life. I don't feel safe when people come up to me and want to get to know me....people have to EARN my trust AND EVEN THEN...I AM REAL CAUTIOUS. People react differently to situations..some cry..some curse..some sleep all day, etc. If I feel a cry coming on..I stop myself..because it only hurts me and not them and then I stop. I would rather laugh and do something postive.

[Sabine]

Re: Real Friend Test

I am sorry you had such bad experience with people, and you are right, I cannot relate to that at all.

[Roxy]

Re: Real Friend Test

Sabine..thank you for being a smile to my face today take care.

[Sewcute]

Re: Real Friend Test

Roxy...after everything you went thru I would say that TOTALLY sucks!!! BUT, I wouls also say you should find some new friends (besides us here, that is !)

When I gave birth to DS (now3), I was rushed to ICU suffering from congestive heart failure, SEVERE pnuemonia, and pulimany edema...I was in a coma and nearly died. Long story short, my brother and wife (just minutes from the hospital) NEVER came to visit, and later wondered why he was not named the God father!!!! My 2 older sisters did not visit...but sent presents for the baby. Several co-called "friends" never visited either...ones I thought would really be there for me...I dont talk to any of them now.

BUT...I had one very dear friend sit by my side, while another took my daughter a few days and overnight twice so my DH could visit me. These were 2 friends I didnt think would "step up". My cousin would call every day, and took my DD overnight a few times...so my DH could stay late, but my siblings did nothing. My neihbor cooked meals every day, even after I got home 2weeks later!!! Meanwhile my MIL expected to be waited on, because she was a "guest" in my home.

My point is: you CANT pick your family members (you can choose not to talk to them),
but you CAN pick your friends...maybe you just picked the wrong ones? I wouldnt give up so quickly.

[Roxy]

Re: Real Friend Test

I am so happy that you came out of the coma..we are both survivors...I was in a coma too. Since you told us what happened to you..I will say this much...I went through a car windshield and flew 50 ft. I wasn't driving the car and I have frontal lobe injury...was paralyzed..can walk now..memory is getting better..had a cornea transplant..can see again so I am truly blessed.I don't know about you..but..I remember things that happened when I was in a coma..do you? I don't need to know the things that you remember..if you do remember stuff....just wonder if you remember things while being in a coma. If you don't want to reply to that question...I totally understand. The things that I remember are private stuff and I won't talk about them in here.

I am happy for all the help you got..as far as the people who didn't help us- because they didn't want to be bothered or whatever the stupid reason was they had...poop on them!!! They weren't friends to begin with. What goes around...comes around. I appreciate you telling me what happened....sending you a big hug I am happy for all of you that have friends..all I am saying...is make sure they are true friends. I guess there is not an easy way to tell if they are or not..unless you are on your death bed. I really respect you for replying to this and telling me not to give up...but..I have given up on that thing called friends. I will not let my wall down..it has gotten too big.

My so called sister- who was my guardian..did some good things to help me..but..at the same time..she did alot of stuff to hurt me & it pertains to alot more than that money thing!

I still say prayers for my family..I just don't contact them..the first hospital I was at...almost killed me..but..what my family and so called friends of mine in the past have done to my heart-has hurt me a h-k of alot worse than the treatment I got at the first hospital. I have no idea why my family didn't throw a law suit at them!! I would have after I recovered..but..there is a time limit that you have to file one. At least that is what I was told or I would have thrown the jury at them and the judge and a whole lot more!!! Take care and God Bless You hugs

P.S. Yes I still do love my family but they have to contact me if they want to work things out. I have tried and tried and they have worn me down.

Anther P.S. I am so sorry for the way your family and the other idiots treated you! That sucks big time too! You and I have dysfunctional families etc big time!

[Sewcute]

Re: Real Friend Test

Roxy,
Seems to me we have the SAME family!!! but it is true what you say "what comes around goes around", and I believe they will get theirs in heaven (or where ever they go )...so much more has happend here as well, and its not worth going thru. Lets just say they are sh-ts and I have no use for them. They only needed me when THEY needed something...I stopped doing for them when I got pregnant an sick...they stopped talking...they are sh-ts.

I am so sorry for all you have been threw...OMG it sounds AWEFUL!!! I cant imagine the pain and torment. But as I said you cant pick your family, you CAN pick your friends. I am here for you. You dont need to tear down your wall...I'll climd it. I am sorry for everything you went thru...seems the man upstairs like to play games with us and give us obsticles, we just need to learn how to get over them.

On a side note: YES - I do remember things and it was not fun. I wish I hadnt heard some of those things...but I did.